“Are you going the Blues on Sunday?” Has been the question of choice this week.

My answer: “Am I hell as like.”

It’s not that I’m scared after the orgy of violence between fans, police and anyone else who wanted a punch up at the game in December.

It is because that the game is at noon on a Sunday and on the other side of town. In the cold. And I’ve lost my hat that I bought for the first game.

I’ve done the noon kick off at Blues before and the players can’t even be bothered to run around the pitch let alone the fans be bothered to invade it.

All life is sucked out of the derby game and then all life is sucked out of you after being marched half way across Birmingham to save you getting your head kicked in.

Last Saturday at Sheffield Utd couldn’t have been more different.

A proper kick off at 3pm so there was chance to enjoy the delights of the Black Country Villa away bus from Stourbridge. Lots of laughs and lots of pints beforehand and not a sight of any trouble.

And we won on my birthday away day.

We won despite having Robert Pires wandering around the pitch like a pensioner in ASDA waiting to be called to buy some boiled ham.

I just can not see how he is better than other midfielders we have. Stephen Ireland should get a game in front of the long haired tackle-dodger.

Kyle Walker lightened up the game with a wonder goal and it would be lovely if we could have him on a permanent basis. As usual the January transfer window is not proving happy hunting ground for the Villa. I mean when the our future-proofed signing of the new ‘Patrick Veira’ collapses because he’s got a bad back you know it’s not going to be a great month.

We could do with some quality and quick because we have several of those beautifully named ‘six pointers’ coming up against Blues and Wigan before we get battered by the two Manchester teams.

We’re still waiting for Omar Cummings to come on the pitch and play for us, at this rate he’ll be off home before he has the chance to win us any games.

It would be great to see his face when he sees the hate-filled flare-throwing atmosphere of the derby on Sunday.

Our striking options are at the bare bones with both Young and Heskey suspended. So perhaps Omar will get a chance to get a one-way ticket to the Villa Hall of Fame by winning the game for us.

Then again if his alarm clock doesn’t go off he’ll probably miss the whole thing because it’s on too damned early!

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